Karyne E. Messina, "It's Not Me, It's You!: How Narcissists Get What They Want and How to Stop Them" (Cascade Books, 2023)


Bullies, bad bosses, human traffickers, and mean girls all manipulate their victims without lifting a finger. This sinister form of mind control is known in the psychoanalytical community as projective identification and blame shifting. Many millions of Americans suffer from this kind of abuse, but they don’t have to anymore—escape and healing is possible.  It’s Not Me, It’s You! How Narcissists Get What They Want and How To Stop Them (Cascade, 2023) will guide readers on their path to exiting toxic relationships and provide tangible, actionable solutions. It’s Not Me, It’s You! is for victims of psychological abuse and provides tips and tools to both fight the pain and to heal. Throughout the text are stories based on representations of the thousands of patients author Dr. Karyne Messina has helped in her practice as a licensed psychologist. Some examples involve actual people, like musicians and businessmen, and the details of those cases are based on public records that are cited throughout. Healing from the pain inflicted by narcissists is possible. It’s Not Me will help you realize that you’re not to blame and that you can take steps towards a positive and healthy life lived on your own terms.

Dr. Karyne E. Messina, EdD, is a licensed psychologist and psychoanalyst at the Washington Baltimore Center for Psychoanalysis and is on the medical staff of Suburban Hospital in Bethesda, Maryland.

Caleb Zakarin is the Assistant Editor of the New Books Network.

Your Host

Caleb Zakarin

Caleb Zakarin is the Editor of the New Books Network.

View Profile